A Halfblood Wedding: When The Gods Are Against You
by prplemyth
Summary: From the proposal to the wedding night, Percy and Annabeth's engagement is chaotic and stressful. But they wouldn't have it any other way. Now if only Hera and Aphrodite quit butting in...
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: This is the long-spoken-about-by-me-because-I'm-really-distracted-all-the-time story that relates to all my Rico oneshots! This is canon with all my other fics (except for Battle of the Raps because it is a parody and therefore just stupidity.)_

_If you catch the How I Met Your Mother reference, you are a winner._

_Read, review, enjoy!_

I was bouncing on the balls of my feet, trying to keep myself from having an aneurism. I hadn't been this nervous since Annabeth and I first – well, you know.

Gods help me that this event won't turn out as uncomfortable as that one.

I shook off the nervousness – this was Annabeth. Things aren't going to be weird or uncomfortable. She's not going to say the wrong thing or change her mind about me or decide that she wants this to be over.

It's all going to be okay.

"A-Annabeth?" I called. Obviously my voice didn't agree that it was all going to be okay. Wincing at the high pitch, I cleared my throat and tried again. "Annabeth?"

She was making me wait in the living room/kitchen of her New York apartment she shared with Rachel while she was dressing, but I for the first time in ages felt uncomfortable standing there.

This would be a great time for Piper to arrive – I was in dire need of some serious charm speak.

Annabeth walked out of the bathroom, a vision in a pale green dress. Did she have to look so good all the time? It made it really hard for me to figure out how to breathe.

"Hmm," said Annabeth, twirling a little bit. Her hair, in a low side ponytail, curled along her right side, looking more beautiful than I could have imagined. "I seem to have chosen well. You have that look on your face that usually means you forget how to speak. And that's always a good sign." She smiled at me, and, not for the first time, I felt like the luckiest twenty three year old on the planet.

I choked, "Uh-duh, uh, yeah," I said. I'm so eloquent. I should write speeches.

"Yeah," said Annabeth, walking over to me, "I chose very well."

She kissed me lightly on the lips, and it was all I could do not to sweep her off her feet and carry her into the bedroom.

The last time I did that she almost killed me for being archaic and misogynistic.

I knew she'd go feminist after taking that Philosophy and Gender class in sophomore year of college.

I kissed her deeper, putting my hand behind her head, but she broke the kiss away. "Now, now," said Annabeth with a little laugh, "Don't we have reservations?"

I shook myself out of my stupor and took a steadying breath before I agreed. "Yeah, reservations." Another deep breath, "Right."

"Wow," laughed Annabeth, taking my hand, "You really like this outfit."

I shrugged. "It's more you I'm fond of, really."

Annabeth paused as she locked her door. "Want a little wine with that cheese?"

"Oh, shut up." Annabeth hated cheesy lines more than she hated Hera, even when I meant them. But I wasn't trying to sound cheesy. It just…It's not easy for guys to tell how they actually feel. And sometimes it gets to the point where I, a guy with no real idea how to sound like a Mr. Rico Suave I-Get-All-The-Girls man, end up saying the dorkiest thing ever.

Annabeth, gods love her, never let me forget it.

The two of us walked down the hallway, hand in hand, until we reached, not the taxi, but the limousine I had rented. Annabeth let out a sigh.

"Whoa."

I shrugged my shoulders and leaned up against the door, "Just a little surprise."

"What's the occasion?"

I opened the door, and forced back the question I wanted to ask. "Oh, nothing."

Annabeth smiled. "You're hiding something from me, Perseus Jackson, and I swear to you I'll find out."

I nodded. "We'll see about that one, Miss Chase."

My breath hitched in my throat when I saw her leg appear out of the slit in her sea green dress.

"Well, Seaweed Brain?" she asked sitting in the car. "You coming or what?"

I nodded. "Yup," I said, barely containing a nervous laugh, "Yup, right here."

I slide into the seat next to her and gave her a quick kiss, careful not to mess up her hair.

"You know," she said, breaking away, "It's just a ponytail, Percy, it's not like a prom hair do."

"Oh gods," I said, wincing at the memory, "Don't remind me."

She patted me on the cheek with her I-know-everything smile. "It's okay, Percy, it's not your fault that you ruined my hair for junior prom two minutes into dancing."

All I could really do was glare at her – she knew how much I hated it when she was right.

And that was most of the time.

"So," she said, leaning against the window. She was peering out at the city – probably picking which buildings she could design better or admiring those she deemed perfect. "Where are we going?"

I smiled. "You'll see," I said in a singsong tone. Annabeth gave me a look.

"I don't like being surprised," she said in a slightly intimidating tone, but after being with her since we were sixteen I had gotten used to it. Sort of.

"Just wait," I said. "You'll find out soon. Once the limo –" We came to an abrupt halt. Annabeth slid forward in the seat and landed with a startled expression on the limo floor.

"Well," she said. "That was…Uncomfortable."

"Ranjit," I said to the driver, "What's going on."

"I'm not actually sure," he said, looking at the two of us in the rear view mirror. "The car in front of us just stopped – it looks like a giant truck is blocking the way."

Annabeth and I exchanged a look. Most people would take that as a hint and blow it off – but we were demigods. When we heard hoof beats, we don't hear zebras or horses. We hear hippocampi or centaurs.

Annabeth turned in her seat and rolled down the window. "Oh, Hades…" She muttered.

"What..."

"Hellhound. One hell of a hell hound, actually."

My hand flew to the box in my pocket. "Um, Annabeth? Before we go running to our deaths…"

Without another word, she pulled open the door and hiked her dress up. Before I realized that she was just going for her thigh holster for her knife, I thought she was about to jump me. Not like I had a problem with that, but I felt like it would have been inappropriate at that time.

"Come on, Seaweed Brain," she said, adjusting the bottom of her dress so it swept the dirty New York sidewalk, "Wipe that look off your face. We have some hellhound to kick."

I scrambled across the limousine seat and tossed the driver a tip of twenty bucks. "Ranjit, we might be back later. I'll dial the number if I need you again, okay?"

He nodded. "See you later, kids."

I slid the rest of the way out of the limo, landing on my feet right in front of Annabeth. "So," she said, twirling the knife in her hands, "Who gets this one?"

"Well," I said, reaching into my pocket and pulling the first thing out. "You're in a fancy dress, so I think I might want to take this one."

"Yeah, but that tux is rented so – " Annabeth made a noise I could liken to a strangling rat and stared at my hand. "What the hell is that?"

"Um, Riptide?" I said. I looked down into my hand, and realized that in my haste, I'd pulled out my sword/pen but the hinge on the wedding ring box had caught on a button and it was hanging on my sleeve.

"What is that?" asked Annabeth with a funny look on her face.

For a moment I couldn't speak. I glanced over to where the hellhound was beginning to devour a car, then back to the person that made me more nervous that the huge dog. "It's…Oh, screw it."

I kneeled down on the dirty cement on one knee, pulled the box off of my sleeve and opened it. "Annabeth, I've been in love with you since before I turned fourteen. It's been nearly ten years since then, and I know that I won't change that opinion. You make me want to rip my hair out, you fight with me, you never cease to prove that you're smarter than me," I looked up into her face and smiled, a goofy grin spreading across my face. "But I love all of those things more than anything. This isn't exactly how I planned to propose," I said, speaking too fast but I didn't care. I gestured around to the setting and grinned apologetically. "But with the two of us I had a feeling that this wouldn't go down easily no matter how hard I tried. Because we're about to go fight for our lives – again – and you'll probably have to save my ass a couple times in the next couple minutes, Annabeth," I took a shaky, deep breath. "Wise Girl, will you marry me?"

The look on her face was indecipherable. Her mouth opened and closed, an expression of confusion and – for some odd reason – annoyance spreading across her face.

"WATCH OUT!" I shouted. Annabeth, for the first time in her life, didn't have the right reaction and continued to stare into the box I was holding in my hand. I rolled my eyes and tackled her to the ground, feeling the hellhound brush over the two of us. The ground shook as its massive body slammed to the pavement feet away from us, and I rolled off of Annabeth to get out of the way. I shoved the ring back into my pocket and prayed to whichever god that it wouldn't fall out. Annabeth, unfortunately, staring at me still. I glared at her. "Look, don't answer yet, fine, but get the hell off of the ground before you end up becoming puppy chow."

Annabeth inexplicably glared at me and stood up quickly, facing the hellhound. I had no idea what was going on – Annabeth seemed pissed at me.

The realization hit me like a brick, and I couldn't exactly wrap my mind around it. She didn't want to marry me.

I watched her, feeling detached, as she sprinted towards the giant creature and slid underneath it on the side of her dress. She plunged the knife up into the belly of the beast, and it exploded in a puff of smoke.

Annabeth emerged from the cloud, her perfect hair bedraggled and her dress shredded in a way that made certain parts of my brain appreciate it more.

The look on her face – irritation, determination, and determination – knocked back into me like a brick. "You don't want to marry me," I muttered, staring at my shoes.

To my surprise, Annabeth just moved her mouth around, and threw her hands in her air.

"I…I'm not sure what you're trying to say, Wise Girl." I felt my heart collapsing in on itself. I'd been drenched in the Styx, I had to hold up the sky, I had to worry that my mother was gone forever, but I had to admit that this was probably the worst feeling of all of that.

She made a frustrated noise and reached her hand down her shirt. I completely forgot my downtrodden state as she did that – I actually just became confused. Then she pulled out the small notebook she always carried around and began frantically scribbling down something.

She handed it to me, and finally gave me a little smile.

_I can't speak! It's Hera…_ She wrote, _But did you seriously think I didn't want to marry you?_

"You want to marry me?" I asked, hope filling my heart.

Annabeth rolled her eyes and laughed silently. She nodded and pulled my tie, dragging me closer to her. Her eyes proved it to me – she was saying yes. Well, sort of.

Once our lips touched, she made a noise. "I can speak!" she shouted, "I can speak! Yes, you idiot! I want to marry you!" She looked in the direction of the Empire State building and up. "Well, after I kick the butt of a certain marriage goddess…"

I grinned at her. "You know," I said, putting my arm around her waist, "I thought you were going to say no."

"No? Really? You thought I was going to say no."

I nodded. "At the very least I expected you to be pissed that I proposed like that."

She shrugged as we walked down the sidewalk. "It wasn't the best proposal," she said, taking my hand in hers. "But it matched with who we are."

"What, crazy demigod losers getting killed six out of seven days?"

She turned my head to hers and kissed me. "Yes."


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N: Sweet noodles it's taken me forever to update this. Sorry about that! And here is the second installment! I decided to put the speaker of the parts of the story at the top of the section to make things clearer._

_Thank you to all my reviewers – it means SO much._

_(And that's not a reference to "Loser of the Rings" near the end there what are you talking about? : P)_

_Read, review, enjoy!_

* * *

_**PERCY**_

"You two are getting WHAT?"

Annabeth sighed and stroked her thumb against the side of my hand. "Percy and I are getting married. He proposed when we nearly got killed by a massive hellhound."

"That's hardly romantic," said Aphrodite, popping in on the Iris Message. Athena glared at her. "What?" the love goddess responded. "Really, you two were supposed to have this epic romance. Granted nearly getting killed…Did he take a knife for you?"

"Well, I actually took a knife for him when we were fifteen. That good enough?"

Aphrodite shook her head, and Athena and Annabeth gave identical eye rolls that kind of worried me. I knew Annabeth had a lot in common with her mother, but only when I saw the two of them together did I realize just HOW much in common.

"Mother," said Annabeth. "Mom, we've been together for, what, nearly eight years? Did you really think that we weren't going to get married ever?"

"I had hoped you would find someone else. Perseus here leaves a lot to be desired in the intelligence department and my relations with his father are far from the best."

Ouch. "Athena, goddess, I –" Annabeth squeezed my hand a little too tightly, a signal that had come to mean "shut up."

"Mother, honestly, has he ever done anything to offend you?"

Athena sighed, and I braced myself for the rant about how I deflowered her daughter and ruined one of the virgin goddess' most wonderful prodigy… "You two were caught in a hotel together a few years back…Together! I'd call that an offense."

"Yes, and clearly we were responsible about it, mother," said Annabeth. She stepped closer towards me, our shoulders close together. "Look, we just wanted to tell you to make sure you wouldn't be in shock." There was a brief silence, and I decided that, what the hell, I might as well jump in. Hopefully I wouldn't end up regretting it.

"In all honesty, Athena, I've kind of been in love with Annabeth since I was fourteen. Regardless of how you feel about me, I'm not sure that'll ever change. So, I guess what I'm trying to say is, um," I swallowed and steadied myself, "um, I intend to marry Annabeth. And I have a feeling that, as a strong woman, you would in no way expect me to think that she needs another person's permission to, um…To marry? Because she doesn't need to be, er, given away, because she's not a possession. I mean…Er…Annabeth's capable of making her own decisions and doesn't need another person making them for her. So…I guess I just mean that I love her and that I want to marry her. And I believe that she's the one who should make the decision whether she should marry me." I felt myself blush red as Athena looked at me, half glaring and half stunned. I had tried incredibly hard to remember everything Annabeth had told me from her feminist theories course about how sexist it was to assume that a woman needed permission to marry.

I hoped I had gotten it right.

"Fine then," said Athena. Annabeth and I couldn't control the looks of shock on our faces.

"Really?" Annabeth asked, a smile breaking across her face. "You mean it?"

Athena nodded, staring me dead in the eye, but I saw the faintest beginning of a smile. "I suppose I realized as Percy was talking that I truly had no authority over who you marry, and that it was absurd to assume so. I may not approve wholeheartedly of your relationship with Sea Salt here, but it would be obvious to even the greatest of dunces that he cares for you more than anything. So," she sighed, as if the words needed to be forced out of her, "so I suppose you have my blessing."

"Thank you so much, Mom!" said Annabeth, grinning. "I, l-love you." Athena looked a little stunned at the words, and it struck me that they may never have had this exchange before.

"Love you too," said Athena, a little awkwardly. "I will speak with you later, daughter."

"Okay."

"Watch yourself, Mr. Jackson," said Athena. "I hope you realize that there is a very good chance that you will mess up before the wedding, and I as of now reserve the right to react in whatever way I see fit when you do. This includes anything from revoking my blessing to setting you on fire."

"Um…"

She waved her hand through the message before I could respond.

Annabeth turned to me, a grand smile spreading across her face. "That went well!" she said, pulling me close to her and planting a kiss on my lips. I could feel her smile, and finally I began to relax.

"Well?" I said, my eyebrows rising. "She threatened to incinerate me."

"Only if you mess up!" she said cheerfully.

"Yeah," I said, "and we both know how likely it would be for me to do that."

"Oh, you." She punctuated it with a kiss to my cheek.

"Now," I said, "we tell my father."

Annabeth immediately went pale. "Do I have to be there? I have a feeling he's going to give me that I-hate-your-mother-so-I-hate-you look."

I nodded. "I was there for you, you're going to be there for me."

Annabeth nodded. "Right."

* * *

_**ANNABETH**_

"So I proposed. To Annabeth. We're getting married."

"That's nice. Anything else new?"

Percy and I exchanged a stunned look. "…Annabeth and I are getting married."

"Hey, I'm not paying. By the way are you inviting Amphitrite? Because this could get awkward with your mother being there and all. I just want to know."

"Are you serious?" I asked with a smile. "You don't mind it?"

Poseidon looked up from the map he was studying and gave me a look that made me feel vaguely like he was trying to drown me with his eyes. "I can't stop it, can I?"

"Well, it's not like –"

"And also Athena notified me about five minutes ago."

"We only stopped talking with her ten minutes ago!" I said, shocked.

"Then you were ten minutes too late, I guess. I suppose my only issue is that it's a bit inconvenient that you ended up with someone whose mother hates me."

Percy laughed awkwardly.. He started fiddling with his hands nervously, like he always did when talking to his father. "I, uh, I don't think –"

Poseidon barked out a laugh. "Oh, believe me, she definitely hates me, what with the existence of you and the fact that my kid's the one who nearly destroyed the world."

"Hey!" said Percy defensively. "I SAVED the world!"

Poseidon raised his hands. "Look, son, her words, not mine. I also think it has something to do with that time in the hotel room –"

"And we're done talking about that!" I said, interrupting brusquely. There was no way I wanted to discuss my sex life with my fiancé's father.

"You two have my blessing," said Poseidon. "Just let me know what I should do about your stepmother and stepbrother. Because there is a very good chance they will attempt to drown all of you."

"Awesome, Dad."

"And son?" said Poseidon just as Percy went to wave his hand through the mist.

"Yeah, Dad?"

"Screw this up and you'll have Athena and me killing you." I was momentarily taken aback.

"What do you mean, Dad?"

Poseidon turned to me with a grin. "I like you, Annabeth. I do think that you're not exactly the expected match for my kid, but you seem to get him levelheaded and you shut him up when he needs it. So I can deal with you."

"Th-thanks, sir."

"My only problem with you is that you're a little too uptight. So chill out a little next time, okay? Don't be afraid to go a little crazy," He turned back to Percy. "I expect you to treat her well, son. Don't be like me."

I didn't exactly know what he was getting at, but Percy sure did. "Never," Percy responded.

I couldn't really do much but blink as he waved his hand to clear the message.

"Crazy?" I asked Percy. "He wants me to go crazy?"

Percy shrugged and took my hand. "I think he's kind of worried you might get me infected with a brain."

"Oh, no," I said, touching him lightly on the nose, "that will never happen."

* * *

_**PERCY**_

"So," I said to Annabeth as the two of us lay in our bed that night. "Fiancée."

"Yes, fiancé?" she responded, turning over to face me. Her blonde hair was piled up in a sloppy bun on top of her hair, small tendrils falling on either side of her face. The book she held in her hands, something about the studies of Kant and his theories, cast a shadow over her eyes. I took it from her and set it down on my bedside table. "Hey!" she protested, leaning over me to grab it. "That's mine."

"Yes," I said, rolling closer to her, "but I was thinking we could chat about something."

"Like what?"

"The wedding," I said, brushing a piece of hair out of the way. Unfortunately I sort of missed and ended up poking her nose.

"Graceful," she said with a smile. "What about the wedding?"

"Well…Like…Who are we inviting? Who's going to be our groomsmen and bridesmaids? And like food? And a band? Oh, gods," I muttered, "this is going to take so much planning. I suck at planning."

"Oh, the downside of being a grad student," Annabeth sighed. "No time for planning anything but your exam schedules."

"You mean I have to do this on my own?" My voice reached a pitch I was pretty sure it had never done since I was twelve.

"I'm kidding, Percy," she said, laughing quietly. "I guess we'll just be really busy once we get everything ready. No time for…Well, anything, really. Who were you thinking for groomsmen?"

I shifted so I was sitting up against the headboard, and Annabeth followed suit. "Well…Tyson, Nico, Leo…How many do I need exactly?"

Annabeth shrugged and pulled her hair out of the bun as she spoke, the curls falling down her back. I couldn't break my gaze as she shook it out. "I don't know. I don't want this wedding to be huge…That would be exhausting to plan and execute. I'll definitely have Thalia, Piper, Rachel, Madison from high school and Maria from college as bridesmaids. I don't think I'll do too many more girls – it'll be too confusing."

"So…In that case I'll go for five guys. Just to make it even. That's how it goes, right?"

Annabeth nodded. "Who are your other two?"

"No idea. I'll do a raffle, or offer prizes or bribe people or something. But I think Nico's my best man."

Annabeth looked surprised. "Really? Why not Tyson?"

I scoffed and said, "Tyson would probably lose the rings in his own pocket. Nico's probably more responsible, and more likely to actually be at the wedding. Tyson gets called off for help with the Cyclopes often now. Nico's the right choice."

"Probably more responsible is right," said Annabeth, cuddling next to me. I wrapped an arm around her.

"Who were you thinking for your maid of honor?"

Annabeth thought for a moment. "At first I guessed Thalia, but she might be a little more protective older sister than I need. Plus," she said, grinning up to me, "her bachelorette party for me would be far too innocent. I think I'm going to go for Rachel as my maid of honor. She's the only one who wouldn't go absolutely crazy trying to make everything go perfectly. I think she'd let things go as they may…And you know what they say about the maid of honor and the best man." Annabeth turned to me and winked.

"No, um," I said, furrowing my eyebrows. "No, I kind of don't."

"They're supposed to hook up," she said with a lighthearted eye roll. "It's a stupid joke, sort of. But I've been dealing with a hell of a lot of tension between the two of them for nearly eight years. I'd like to see what would happen in this situation."

"You are a little scheming devil," I said. This wasn't the first time she did one of her little social experiments on some of her friends. She tested Reyna and Jason and Piper's little triangle herself, ultimately leading Jason to not only pick Piper but Piper ended up making Jason prove himself to her, all because of Annabeth's choice phrasing.

The girl was a mastermind.

"Of course I'm a scheming devil. I've been messing with you since the day we met. "

"Have not."

"Of course I have. And it will only get better now that we're getting married."

"You don't mess with me much anymore, though," I said. Suddenly I was hyper aware of how close she was, and how thin the material of her silk top was. Despite the years we'd spent together, Annabeth and I still had fire. I had a feeling we always would.

"Really?" she asked, moving away from me and tilting her head to the side. Her hair fell to the side, exposing her neck and the thin straps of her pajama top. I felt my breath hitch. "You really think I don't mess with you?"

"Neefuh?"

She crawled towards me and sat on my lap, straddling me and letting her hair fall like a curtain over her shoulders. "That's what I thought."


End file.
